How to leave a cult

Found this on Wiki-how - don't know how actually just came up when I was looking up something totally unrelated. I thought it was appropriate and wanted to share it here. Anyone looking to leave please do! You won't get it until you do but you will get it I promise!! How about I put a little "CHECK" by some of those that sound reminiscent of my time at ntcc. . . . you add yours as you read too woncha? 


How to leave a cult:

1.                        Recognize if you're in an abusive religious group. In some places these are called "cults"; in others, "sects" or "fundamentalist" groups. Cults generally involve aggressive misinformation or misinterpretation ("brainwashing"), self-aggrandizement and even worship of a leader, isolation from and disrespect of outsiders, and undermining members' self-esteem. Check

Think through the reasons that cause you to want to leave the cult. Are any of these reasons based on abuse,Check oppression,Check lack of freedom of thought/speech/mobility, etc.?Check If so, consider seeking help from authorities who can intervene where laws are being broken.

Plan your departure. If you're in a cult that lives in a compoundCheck, you might be planning an escape rather than a mere departure. Where this is the case (and if you're even allowed to be reading this article), you'll need to plan very carefully and take any possible opportunity that arises to leave. Either have your bag packed and carefully stowed away, or simply be prepared to forget any possessions and get ready to go at a moment's notice. Even if you can leave at your own leisure, leaving will be no picnic in the park.

Leave. If you're getting away in a hurry from a live-in cult, use opportunities such as when people visit, when you are taken somewhere else outside the compound, when others in your compound decide to make a break for it at the same time (if you know that you can trust them). If you're leaving at your own pace, arrange for collection of you and your possessions by taxi, or a friend or family member not involved in the cult. If you don't need to physically leave the cult but you do need to break ties with it, then not returning to services will be the first indication that you have gone.(JUST LEAVE!!!)

Try to have a place to stay in mind in advance. If you've left a live-in cult arrangement, you'll need a safe place to stay. Consider family, friends, refuges (shelters), or even a mainstream church charity. If you're in danger, the authorities should be able to help. Check - Hey I had to go to a shelter b/c I was left with nothing - it's ok, God will bless and get you out!

Be prepared for recriminations and attempts to get you back.Check Cultists tend to despise those who break ranks and threaten to expose what is really happening inside the cult. You will be viewed as a traitor and as someone who might be worth vilifying and telling lies about. Be prepared for this possibility. Alternately, they might seek to get you back by telling you that you're confused, Checkthat the evil from the outside has infected you, and that you need to return to be cleansed and restored.Check The important thing is to stand firm in believing that your choice to move on is right and that they might try anything. If you're afraid that they might try to physically take you back, seek protection. Finally, be prepared for excommunication and no further word.Check That can actually hurt a lot more than it might seem initially because suddenly you are forever cut off from those people you once knew really well. This is the time to get the support of other people who now surround you.

Remain strong in your convictions and beliefs. Your faith will be tested. You might want to read spiritual texts, read a variety of books with different interpretations of those spiritual texts, and visit other religious groups. It can also help to read about the experiences of other people who have broken away from cults to draw strength from how they coped with it.

Seek support from other people. Many people are sympathetic even if they don't understand the challenges facing those who exit a cult. Sometimes you might also need the help of an expert who specializes in reframing the lives of those who have experienced a cult lifestyle. If you've been under a lot of cult indoctrination expect some emotional withdraw. At the least sleep as much as you need, eat nutritiously and talk with people who are not involved with the cult. This will let you get accustomed to life as a non-cult member.

Continue journeying. Eventually you will be able to talk with others about your experiences and this might even translate to being able to help others in a similar bind. There are support networks online for people who have left cults; you might want to tap into those resources to share stories and spread support. In terms of your own spiritual journey, remain open-minded. The choice of some people to turn beliefs into cultish behaviors and narrow-minded self absorption is the exception rather than the rule. Most people of faith nurture their faith through reaching out to everyone in the community and lead lives that combine the secular and faith in tandem. This is worth striving for to ensure that you are whole and connected.

Tips

•   If you still live near members of the cult, they might be spiteful or spread gossip about you.Check, Check, and Check! Warn friends, neighbors, etc., of what has happened. Remain polite when you see them around the streets and your persistence in being strong and polite will place you on the higher ground. You never know who might be contemplating the same move as you, so showing that it works can be a sign of support for them.
• Do not give anyone in the cult the idea you are leaving. They will do their best to convince you and may not just stop at words to make you stay. Just leave quietly.Check
• Some cults may send people to hunt you down and take you back to the group. You may be in danger. Get help from someone outside, and when you escape hide until it is safe.

Divorcing the Cult . . . . and thespians

I'm inspired to write this because I'm finally, literally, divorcing the cult! I began the process for my divorce. I'll be going in to the court soon to actually file. My ex (well soon to be) though we've been separated for what about 7 years now; he actually "Said" he'd pay for half of the fee. I'll believe it when it happens. I am absolutely shocked he didn't run to the court house the second I said I wanted to separate. But the truth in that (as I've said in the past) was after I said that, and in front of MCK the sleez bag who never was man enough or Godly enough to try to help anyone in their family or marriage, who also must've (Accidentally - I'm sure! NOT) forgot to tell RWD I wanted to talk to him. I was ready to speak my mind but of course, I was beat back down instead. 

In ntcc they encourage if the spouse leaves, the one remaining is FREE to remarry - WELL it is so far from the truth, especially here! HE chose to leave b/c I wouldn't put up with his hypocritical crap any longer. I wonder how many of them "Licensed Preachers" are just like him? He never read, prayed, said anything Godly, UNLESS he was AT church or in front of others, then it was AMEN Brother, Lord Willing, Praying For you, or I read.....the other day - COME ON folks what a lying crock of nonsense! You ain't praying for no one. And Lord willing? LORD WILLING you'd get a brain and get out of thespianism already and become a REAL Christian. And when do they read? The "Licensed Minister" that was my "Husband" (JOKE there) but any way - he never read. Who else? I'd ask, beg him to read with me or pray with me. There was more time for the "Un-TV" on the "Sinnernet" then there was for God. But shhhh don't tell anyone we're watching TV shows or movies on the sinnernet - woulnd't want to be lamb basted or get in trouble. (AKA - shunned) Key words and actions that are important to think about when determining - NTCC IS REALLY A CULT.

So little Danny boy told me - oh yeah, you want a divorce, I'm leaving. Well  I never told him that (until yesterday - 8/13/13). Now I've tried communicating since before yesterday to no response - when I said ok, I'm ready to do this, I need an address to serve you for divorce, boy he chimed right in! Hmmm what a big hypocrite. 
BUT this is where I'm going. . . . he is part of this cult and is a terrible yet good actor like the rest. Goodness, I look back now and see all the theatrics of that cult. . . . I too once was a thespian and I didn't even know it. I didn't start off one. I had a true and genuine desire to worship and serve the Lord when I came to this cult. They seek the genuine and tender hearted. They know how to turn them around and manipulate and that is what they did. They take you to services, or thespian classes if you will. They act, they repetitively act at that. The more the repetitions, the more brainwashing you receive. I stumbled on a couple of articles on how to determine a cult and how to exit a cult. I'm going to post both. We've had things like this before either on mine or any of the other blogs but I think it's good to keep it freshly posted for anyone who comes to it and needs it.

When I was in the cult of ntcc, it was very hard for me to believe any of their nonsense wasn't true until finally one day I just left THEN God could show me. Outsiders can see it. They try to tell you and point it out - we discount it. There are so many trues that shouldn't be discounted in these. 

How to determine a cult:

1.                     1

Learn the organization's foundations. Cults tend to have very simple and similar foundations and common factors having all or some of the following:

o          A charismatic founder, leader or leadership.

o          Have a structured central bureaucracy.

o       Simplified goal or aim structure, such as to save something or introduce something to everyone.

o        A society history, most new initiates are invariably required to learn and respect the founding figures.

o       There is a degree of intellectual limitation, so outside ideas or interaction with non members are not encouraged

o         There is also a system of repercussions, such as shunning, "time out" or isolating or demotion.

o        There is a system of development, so a person may be groomed or encouraged to go towards certain roles, or assist in various ways.

o        There is a tithe, membership dues or other system of getting money from members, rather than earning it externally.

Think about how common this is. You might notice that most political parties, social clubs, sporting & health clubs, credit and banking systems, most religions and nationalities actually have these features and these are not what would be classified as dangerous.

o     Most political parties have founding members, political history, ideology and identity and discourages interaction with "non members" or those with a different ways of looking at things. In effect there is an entrenched discouragement to change ideas, while having a trained loyalty system. There is also a degree of reverence for political leaders in the past, only if they were of that particular party, but members who cross the floor are deemed traitors.

Avoid becoming paranoid. Because the system used is so mainstream, you probably will be seeing it everywhere but that does not make every society or group dangerous. It just gives them the potential to be one.

Decide if there is an element of exploitation either financial or personal. This ultimately is where groups cross the line into a dangerous organization.

Look for the key danger signals for medium level risks: It may be OK to have some association with them, but stay on guard.

o       Members are encouraged to do certain practices, methods & techniques and only those. There is no exploration, modification or comparison with other similar or different systems.

o        The screening of new potential members is quite large as they filter looking for suitable like minded, or easily moldable people. The society can accept and wear the money costs involved in having a very high grassroots turnover to get a few potentially ultra-loyal members, like-minded or easily manipulated members.

o       There is a noticeable degree of repetition, so key figures such as the founder and their stories often repeated to train people to think the same way.

o      There is a medium degree of personal image inflation to make certain figures appear greater than they really were and that association with them is a great or noble thing.

o       Members are all very similar and have minimal contact with the outside world, or the real world.

o        There is a substantial amount of time, money and thought and encouragement invested in promotion, lobbying and marketing.

o       Tax free status a major aspiration, or have already attained that.

o      Funds or proceeds do not stay in the country or state they were earned in.

Investigate further. Such groups might still not be a danger to society, either in design or effect, but could one day be run by someone who will take it that direction very easily.

Look for high risk signs: These are usually signs that it has crossed the line into a dangerous or potentially dangerous organization.

o       Manipulation of initiates is obvious to outsiders.

o       It is very difficult, if not impossible to leave their society. The aim is to make the new person addicted or so familiar that the person loses the ability to be independent, or the fear of repercussions are too high.

o       That members are required to part with large amount of funds or assets.

o        There is a high degree of mental stagnation, so that there is a focusing on key principles or myths and general day to day knowledge is encouraged to be forgotten.

o        There is a degree of mentally stressful or intensive practices. These maybe long meditation retreats with little sleep or food, high intensive workouts or other things. They may be branded with an element of mystique and privilege.

o       That it is impossible for an ordinary member to have the same skills or status as the founder or leadership. So the founder may be a dubbed an avatar, master, guru, Bodhisattva, genius or other highly attained person, but the initiate will never be on the same level, especially if some "powers" are not possible to develop ordinarily or even exist. Members may or may not ever be aware of this. Leaders and next generation leaders are planned with no involvement or selection from the existing members.

o        That all actions committed by members are justified or will be praised. Martyrdom may be encouraged.

o     There is a very effective propaganda system and intensive (but covert) political lobbying.

o    There is not always a vast leadership structure, but there can be. The more manipulative cult leadership prefers a wide gap between their status and others so may practice a more flat working hierarchy. This can create "succession" issues, but usually its known who the next in charge will be in advance.

o    There is a definite separation from society.

If you see these signs, it is best to do one or all of the following.

o     Learn your rights.

o       If you are not prepared to leave the town, Stay calm and simply don't get involved or take risks. Keep a polite distance so you are not made into an "enemy" of their group which can be potentially dangerous in tight knit communities or remote towns. They won't harm you until you are a threat to them.

o      Keep your thoughts and feelings to only those you trust.

o      Encourage dialogue and exchanges between other groups. This prevents minorities or dissenters being silenced and the "cult" taking over the town. This does have confrontation risks if that was the plan all along however.

o      Move if it becomes intolerable or unsafe. No-one is keeping you there but yourself.

o       Notify your federal law enforcement agency if there is a clear sign of the law being broken. Legally they need a "smoking gun" to act on. 

Warnings

•    The most manipulative ones tend to be the most mundane to look at because they are designed to avoid being the focus of attention.

•     As mentioned before, be safe and avoid taking risks. They won't place much interest in you until you are a risk to them, or you are a good "fish" to catch.

•    Paranoia is really your biggest enemy, dangerous cults do exist but they actually aren't very common or have much to do with the outside world.

JIG A BOO

Lies, all lies - within the first couple of pages of the bible, we read of Satan. He was beautiful, yet his purpose was not that of beauty. He came to lie and deceive.  Satan wasn't the only one who had a pretty face with a black heart.

Can you walk with God and not know God's word? God's voice? God's truth? Many times we don't even think about it or we assume God would give us a special insight if what we "believe" isn't true. Many "Christians" including those who have professed to be so for many years, are clueless when it comes to the Word of God.

Can you quote a bible verse for every year you were a "Christian"? Can  you tell when God is telling you that is false or when He gives you the go ahead? Do we know when we're asking for God to help us what His voice sounds like when the reply comes?

Why do we follow someone, anyone, who has a "License" that says "Preacher" or "Minister" on it? If someone offers a juicy song and dance from behind the pulpit, does that make him a great preacher? Did that make that a sermon straight from God Himself or a sermon straight from hell?  Just because someone can "Cut the rug" or "Speak in tongues", does that make them Holy, prophets, true men/women of God?  If someone-A-speaks loud-A-and breaths hard-A- while preaching-A- does that make their sermon straight from the spirit of the Lord?

Why don't we question these people? Why do we not test to see if the fruits are real? It's time to WAKE UP!!! Don't take a "License" as the gospel truth! Just because they talk fast A, loud A, bold A, and can move you, doesn't mean it's the gospel truth! Just because someone can pump, and prime, and move the masses, it doesn't make the service a Holy Ghost break down!!! It simply means you were moved IN YOUR FLESH by the HYPE or EXCITEMENT of that persons theatrics.

Can you recite 10 bible verses? 20?  Can you read the Word of God and know what GOD says not what someone with hype from a pulpit with a paper in their wallet says? Do you know what God's vision is in your life? In your families life? For your job? Your future? YOUR LIFE?  If you said no to any of these, you just might be a JIG A BOO.

I was introduced to P4CM - Passion for Christ Movement. There are several poets who recite poems with meaning, inspiration, etc. delivering a good message - not just poems, but art. This lady calls a spade a spade and a Jig A Boo, a Jig A Boo. Are you a spade or a Jig A Boo?  You Tube - Jig A Boo

Get up and ask God to show you HIS Truth. Don't let the hype of some feel good message move you - LET GOD MOVE YOU. Don't let some Jig A Boo tell you what you should know. Get in to the Word and get to know for yourself!! 

God loves you and doesn't want you to be a lost Jig A Boo. Come to know His word and find Peace and freedom from the Jig A Boo lifestyle. Don't be held or enslaved to the ways of the Jig A Boo.

God bless,

Kat

PS: If any one is offended by the title or the use of the word Jig A Boo - then please hit your knees. I'm not using a slanderous word regarding any race or color. I'm re-using the word another person used as someone who is a hulla-ba-loo, hot air breathing, bag of hypocrisy. I in no way intend to offend any specific skin color or race - only those hypocrites. . . . . as such, once was I. Hypocrites come in every color, red, brown, yellow, black, and white. The bible says we are ALL precious in His sight - you remember the song right?